twisted logic - when one door closes, another opens

Tuesday, August 26, 2003

resolutions for e rest of e week:

1) boycott yet another stall at ghim moh food centre! tamade...it's e xiao wan mian stall this time...happily ordered three xiao wan mians for me and my classmates during break today...theirs were fine..somehow mine got extra 'liao4'...got this veh thin thin long curly abit-red-but-mostly-black disgusting strand of mutant meepok... well actually it's not meepok la... its a long strand of hair!!! buried happily into my nice bowl of meepok! arggghh!! walauz i'm not ordering food frm there anymore man...NEVER!

2) smile more! my jie says i got cao bin...which is true...which i dun like...so i gonna smile more and be less cao when i'm stoning around...plus i'll owe her a curry puff for everi ten cao bins i show...well it's three more to e first curry puff lor..must be more careful frm now on...

3) exercise! damn i'm eating more and moving about less ever since pe lessons were a thing of e past... shall eat less fried stuff and start getting ppl to play intensive bball during weekends... healthy living is good for health! erm...duh..

4) do my tutorials and overdue tutorials and revision tutorials and remedial tutorials and blah blah blah ah ka bish ka bong ka bish...

5) tidy up my room! it has evolved into a fully functional garbage dump in e past few months...

yup... tat's it... all e best to everibody for prelims pract and gp next week!

hengster @ 8:36 PM
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twenty days to prelims...

gotta start studying real real hard!!
haha... i bet five days from now i'll repeat e above line again...

sigh... mood in sch is real diff nowadays...reminds me of primary six after first prelims (we had two prelims back den...my sch is how kiasu..)

everione mugging more...moving quicker to classrooms and lecture halls...and sleeping less in class...(yup even zonglun sleep less lately)

kinda like this atmosphere though... got e veh peaceful feeling around... add e recent rainy weather and sch has finally become conducive for studying...
(tink 90% of my total visits to e library are in these few weeks)

and teacher's tutorial stuff all starts to make sense more... mr sze is like how powerful...inspired me to start reading my phy notes properly...

now tinking back...

primary six PSLE: din like studying at all...got forced into mugging cos was blardy scared of teachers...i mean it...realli realli scared of them...

everiday just keep doing vocab wksheets and psle twenty-yr series....my pri sch is realli good at making us practise..
realli tink i wun make it...cos my higher chi paper rephrased everi single answer...a method untried of prior to psle...was all prepared to just go a sch nearby to study alredi....

secondary four O Levels: slacked like siao in sec 3 and 4... totally dun understand physics... geog and history closely linked to e letters E and F... results downright suck...

pia quite a lot at e last few crucial weeks...was veh motivated during tat time...and quite hopeful of my results this time round...

and now comes THE A levels...

hais... i dun like it at all lor
i'm not born a hardworking smart mugger who camps in e library five times a week 40 weeks a year...

i'm born to watch tv play computer go out play pool play bball play play play

why cant i do what i like?

i know i know...at least not at this pt of time...just mug for this last stretch and after tat everithing will be a breeze

tamade..tats what u all said for psle and olevels too..just keep bluffing e poor innocent boy larh...

sigh...if only i'm born in some rural farming countryside in a ulu province of china... i'd have been a real happy person

if only

hengster @ 8:05 PM
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Monday, August 11, 2003

You have a dominant kiss- you take charge and make
sure your partner can feel it! Done artfully,
it can be very satisfactory if he/she is into
you playing the dominant role MEORW!

What kind of kiss are you?
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hengster @ 7:56 PM
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You're the sad smile,the one that regrets nearly
everything and is constantly wondering about
what could have been.You're not happy with your
situation and usually blame yourself because of
the bad things that have happened.Cheer up.

What Kind of Smile are You?
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hengster @ 7:49 PM
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You are Storm!

You are very strong and very protective of those
you love. You are in tune with nature and are
very concerned with justice and humanity.
Unfortunately, certain apprehensions and fears
are very hard for you to overcome, and can
often inhibit you when most need to be strong.

Which X-Men character are you most like?
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hengster @ 7:45 PM
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What Finding Nemo Character are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

hengster @ 7:17 PM
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Sunday, August 10, 2003

in quite a nice mood now=)

was sick of reading my organic chem notes just now...so decided to tidy up my room...hmm somehow realised all my postcards and letters were scattered all over my room, so why not pack them all nicely? yup so i started searching around my room, firstly i need a box... found one, but its kinda big, so scavenged my cupboard and finally after rearranging almost everithing inside and nearly losing my balance while standing on e bed and crashing onto e wall, i found this old nike shoe box which i dun realli rem having...yup its not bad just e kinda box i have in mind..

so next i went to find e postcards and letters...some on e notes shelve, some on e cabinet above my study table, some in my drawer...ended up with quite a number of them...hmm so as i was packing them into e box i started to read some of them...heh realised this four yrs, ever since i joined yv in sec 3, i've met many many nice ppl...some i still quite close to them, some lost contact alredi...budden can still rem all of them clearly...

i tink memory is a realli good thing...i realised whenever i feel realli depressed and down and tat life totally sucks, it's e memory of e good times that keeps me going on...i rem all e nice ppl frm yv, all e things we have done together, and just simply e good old days, and tat is enough for me to regain hope for e future and look forward to tmr alredi...

and sometimes when anger or frustration clouds up my mind, i may have felt so lost and just want to run away and hide forever...but luckily some point in time i will remember e past, and gain strength frm it to carry on...things tat have passed may not all be nice, but it's actually e unpleasant things tat teach me e most...i hate e kinda feeling of being misunderstood, and because of tat nowadays i have taken to try to express myself clearer and clear any misunderstandings tat i have caused, and i guess it realli helped me a lot...

yarh like when i feel so damn fed up about studies and tat e world is so unfair, i can look back a yr ago, two yrs ago, and be happy about what i have experienced..this happiness is a kinda long term one, and i'm realli contented and looking forward to tmr just like e cheerful little kid i was in pri one...hahah...stupid alevels, u are just a small little ant lor...i'm gonna mug hard and give e old beer-drinking cambridge markers a darn good reason to give me good grades man...

okai, one of e letters tat i had packed just now caught my attention e most, and it was given to me at e time i was feeling e most down, two yrs ago...it realli saved me, realli...and yarh i like e quote inside:

"when the pathway seems long,
when temptation is strong,
when your strength's almost gone,
that's the time to press on."

hengster @ 9:35 PM
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Thursday, August 07, 2003

successfully skipped school today!

heh although its only half day lessons todae, felt realli good to have slept a full 9 hours till this morning... havent got so much rest in ages alredi...

oh had to miss lessons cos right foot big toe got stepped on twice and kicked once accidentally while playing bball...end up with a bit of blood clot which looks damn gross at e start...its much better now but still cant wear shoes...

dammit i have to recover before tmr man...there's inter-constituency handball match...

Anyway, i guess being positive is the most impt thing in life.

It's because being positive urself can bring a smile to others and let them feel optimistic about life and cheerful as well.

yup help urself and help others in e process...

oh hahah dad says i shudnt play bball anyway...bleargh i dun care him lar...budden its true tat 90% of e injuries i sustained came frm bball...here's some recollections:
1) got a bruise on my lips e first time i played bball in rj bball court.
2) second time play and i tink i got hit in e face again.
3) was chasing e ball den tripped and got a cut on my left elbow.
4) sprained my right ankle damn badly this yr...real foolish injury cos i was running den dunno why my feet din move and it went cRaCcKkkkk....yucks.
5) fell while playing handball and scratched both palms badly...knee got a deep cut that took weeks to heal...
6) fell again frm slipping at the paint area in e centre of e court... right palm got scratched yet again and left knee got this scar tat wouldnt go awae
7) tat scar tat wouldnt go away was healing liao...den was fighting with my sis and i failed to dodge this flying pillow...hit e scar and it was kinda exposed again.
8) was walking past this group of chairs at e hawker centre den scratched e exposed wound accidentally...kinda bled...eeee walau...and it took many many weeks to re-re-heal...

hahah i'm a careless boy sia....just keeps getting injured for no good reasons...

hengster @ 1:17 PM
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Saturday, August 02, 2003

what a tiring day...

morning went rj for scholarship fair...only now do i realise tat scholarship depends a lot on s papers...wad a waste man now i have to settle with e very few which only require 4 As...and also work hard to get my 4 As...sigh studying life is a sad life man...

after tat went ri play bball...dammit i suck...played against sec1s for gryphons cup also can play until so tired...tink i scored only 6 pts...out of the 80+ tat e team scored...made many stoopid stoopid mistakes haiz..have to play more full court and build up my stamina man....went there tinking only got one match at 1 plus...den realised evening got another match..so stayed at ri in e end until 9 plus i tink...ultra tiring and my eyes hurt a lot frm contacts wearing...

i've been in quite confused mood lately...hais...i shud just keep on mugging and forget bout other things in life

tmr will be a better day

hengster @ 11:14 PM
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